


You Would Think

by scooter3scooter



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt and comfort, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Runaway, before the bite, pre-Spider-Man
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-23
Updated: 2018-11-23
Packaged: 2019-08-27 23:05:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 3,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16711726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scooter3scooter/pseuds/scooter3scooter
Summary: You would think being Tony and Pepper Stark’s kid would be great. You would think that I get everything I want and that life is perfect. It’s not. What I want, is my parents. I want them here. I know that’s selfish. I know I’m selfish. But Mom is always out at business meetings and work trips. I know running Stark Industries is a lot on her...but I need her too. And Dad...he risks his life every day. He’s a hero. I’m nothing. Actually… I’m a burden. They waste their time and energy on a kid as worthless as me. I can’t do anything. I can’t run a company or save the world. It’s better off with me gone.





	1. Chapter 1

You would think being Tony and Pepper Stark’s kid would be great. You would think that I get everything I want and that life is perfect. It’s not. What I want, is my parents. I want them here. I know that’s selfish. I know I’m selfish. But Mom is always out at business meetings and work trips. I know running Stark Industries is a lot on her...but I need her too. And Dad...he risks his life every day. He’s a hero. I’m nothing. Actually… I’m a burden. They waste their time and energy on a kid as worthless as me. I can’t do anything. I can’t run a company or save the world. It’s better off with me gone.

I’ve contemplated running away many times. Every time I’m left without them, every time I mess up, every time I just add more to their plates. It’s already been too long. I’m fourteen, I can do fine on my own. I’ve been left alone enough times already.

I grabbed my backpack, which I already stuffed with the necessities. I put the note on my nightstand. I think they’ll miss me, but they’ll realize it’s better this way.

“Hey Pete, ready for school? Happy can’t drive you today, you alright walking?” My dad greeted me when I walked into the kitchen.

“Yeah. I gotta go. I love you,” I hugged him longer than I should have.

“You okay, kid?” He looked me in the eye, a firm hand on my shoulder.

“Yeah, I'm good,” the lie fell out of my lips so naturally.

“Okay kiddo, you better head out,” he ruffled my hair before I walked out of the room, trying so hard to keep my tears at bay. That's the last time I'll see him.

I easily made my way downstairs, as everyone thought I was heading to school. It’s a normal day to everyone else.

_To everyone else…_

I turned left instead of right. I chose running away instead of going to school. I may not be as remarkable as my dad, but I’m not stupid. It’s not like I don’t have money from my birthdays. It’s not enough for forever, but it’s enough to get away.

Part of me just wants to get as far away as possible. But I have to be smart. If they look for me, I have to evade them as much as possible. It’s better this way.

I got a cab to the train station, and from now on...I’m a runaway.

“Kid, where you goin’?” The gruff man asked me when I approached the train ticket booth.

“Boston,” I answered with more certainty than I thought possible. It’ll take about four hours, but hopefully no one would expect me to go more North East. But from there I’ll go back west. This should help cover my tracks enough.

_Soon...Dad’ll get a notice that I’m not in class. He’ll call, but I left my phone at the tower. Then he’ll call Ned, who knows nothing of my plan. Ned...I won’t see him again. He deserves better than me._

“-id. Son, take your ticket. You’re holding up the line,” his impatient voice cut through. I sputtered an apology, clutching the ticket in one hand and clutching my backpack strap in the other. I got out of the way before I could cause more trouble. All I cause is trouble…

Will they cry? They love me...how long with they look before they give up?

I made sure in my note to be clear that it isn’t a suicide note, I couldn't let them misinterpret it.

**Dear ~~everyone,~~ my family,**

**I'm sorry. I know it won’t seem like it, but I am. I don’t want to hurt you anymore, but that’s why I’m leaving. This isn’t a suicide note, I promise, I don’t want you to worry any more than you already will. This is a note to say I’m leaving. Nobody knows that I’m doing this, so you can’t blame each other. This is not any of your faults, it’s mine. It’s always been mine. I'm a burden and I can’t change that. I wish I could. This is for the best.**

**I love you,**  
**Peter**

It’s a crappy note, but I wrote it in a haste before I left. It was already hard enough to convince Friday to keep my secret. If the school doesn’t call in time, Friday will tell them.

Then a warning came over the loudspeaker that the train is approaching. _This is it. Now or never. Now._

I entered the train. I didn’t look back. Because I knew if I did, I would cry… I would go back.


	2. Chapter 2

I hadn’t anticipated the fact that even if I had looked back or not, I would cry. It’s silent, but holding it in enough to be quiet just makes it hurt more.

 

_ At home, when I would cry. Dad would hold me close, kiss me on the head, and let me cry. Then he would help me, fix it if he could.  _

 

_ But he wasted his time. He doesn’t deserve me. He deserves everything better. _

 

That was the wrong thought to think as I had to clamp a hand over my mouth to stay quiet. No one bothered to even glance at me.

 

I fell asleep like that. One arm wrapped around my backpack, hugging it against my chest, and my other hand to cover my face. 

  
  
  


It’s not like Mom and Dad didn’t try. But the thing is that they  _ did _ . They tried  _ so hard _ to raise me right. They tried  _ so hard  _ to be there for me. To be a normal family. But even when I never got to know normal, it doesn’t mean it kills me every time they live. Though it always brings more life back into me every time they come back, you can only live like that for so long. I’m surprised it took me so long to crack. To break. To shatter into unfixable pieces. So unfixable not even The Mechanic can fix them.

 

I’m broken, aren’t I?

  
  


It was when I arrived at Boston that I saw the news playing on the tv screens. 

 

**Tony Stark's Son Missing**

 

_ Crap. _

 

Aunt Nat always said that the best way to run, was to walk. So that’s what I did. I walked out. And no one saw me. I’m invisible.

 

Of course pictures of me have gotten around, but it’s not like I ever did anything interesting. At least not that the world knows. I barely even went to parties. They just...it’s too overstimulating. Cameras and talking and people and lights and music and  _ oh so many people. Too many. Too much. I can’t do it. _

 

Who would even notice me? I’m nothing.

 

“Hey!” I called out to a taxi driver, “I gotta get to a different station.”

 

“K, get in,” he expressed a negative four in emotion.

 

“You want to head to a specific station, or just a different one?” He asked monotonous. 

 

“Just a different one is good,” I held my backpack close.

 

Even in the car the sound of thrusters still managed to, for the first time, terrify me. I shouldn’t be surprised that he found me so quickly. But I guess I hoped otherwise. It’s not like I could outrun him, but he’ll probably use Friday to scan for my vitals. The best scenario would be to stay in the taxi and hopefully get to the next station. 

 

_ There’s no way… _

 

The thought of him ripping the door off this taxi in the middle of Boston was enough to get me running out of the car. There’s no possible way I could get anywhere without being found. So I just slipped into an alley.

 

_ I’m so stupid. So, so, so stupid. I should have known better. I did know better. But I’m an idiot and I wasted his day looking for me just because I couldn't handle being his son. I’m selfish and worthless and I don’t deserve this life. I deserve nothing. I don’t deserve my family to be cases pain because of me. They deserve to be happy. I can’t do that. I can’t do this. _

 

I was too lost to hear that familiar sound of my dad coming. He’s coming. 

 

That shouldn't have caused me to panic more.

 

My breaths got too quick. My thoughts all blurred together. Everything hurts. It  _ hurts _ . The ground hit me too quickly. Red stained my hands and knees. I can’t find it in me to care.  _ When did I start crying?  _ But it’s like as soon as I realized I was crying, the sobs took over. Ugly and horrible and  _ I can’t breathe _ .

 

Metal and clanking and I hear him. But I can’t get up. The ground is cool against my face but it’s like my tears are lava.

 

But it hurts.

 

“-ter! Peter?! Hey, hey, look at me,” his frantic voice tried to cut in. I failed at shaking my head and another sob shook my body. It won’t stop.

 

“Just breathe with me, okay, in and out, watch me,” he sat me up, holding me against his chest. But everything’s blurry and...and-

 

“Peter! Hey, stay awake, alright. Follow me, in...out...in...out, come on Pete, in...out...that’s right, in...out, you’re doing  _ so  _ good kid...in...out, I’m so proud of you, in…out…”

 

It just repeated over and over and over and over...


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony and Peter have a little talk

_ No. No, no, no, no… _

 

_ I’m home. _

 

“Pete, I know you’re awake,” Dad’s voice sounded. He didn’t sound angry, or disappointed, as I expected, but more sad. Hesitantly, my eyes opened, I didn’t make a sound. I just listened to the constant beeping of the heart monitor and tried to ignore the headache the overly strong scent of disinfectant.

 

“Kid…” he let out a breath, “I know you know that we need to talk. I just… I don’t know where to start.”

 

“Dad, I’m so-”

 

He cut me off, “ _ don’t _ ,” I don’t think he meant to make it sound so harsh, “don’t apologize. Just explain.”

 

_ I did this to him...he’s trying so hard to stay calm. I deserve for him to yell. I deserve for him to have left me in that alley. I deserve so much worse. _

 

“I put it in my note,” I heard myself saying.

 

_ That was the wrong thing to say. _

 

“You’re note? You’re note?!” Now he’s growing to a yell, “you told us not to worry! You didn’t explain why, all it is is self-deprecating thoughts and a goodbye! How could you…” he took a moment to just breathe, “do you really think you’re a burden?”

 

_ How am I supposed to answer that? Lie and make him even more mad? Tell the truth and just disappoint him more? _

 

“I’ll never be like you…” was all I could say before my throat started to close.

 

He rubbed a hand down his face, diverting his eyes from my pathetic body, “I never wanted you to be like me. I wanted you to be better.”

 

I quickly rubbed the tear that leaked from my eye away. 

 

“Come here kid,” he mumbled before pulling me into a tight hug.

 

“Wait, where’s Mom?” I cut through the almost good moment.

 

“She...she had to take a break for a little bit. I got her to go to sleep. Otherwise she would have never left your side.”

 

_ I’m disappointing her. She’ll hate me if she doesn’t already...they all will. And I deserve them too. All I do is mess everything up. I couldn't even run away right. _

 

“Peter…” he pulled away, “why didn’t you talk to us, any of us, that you are feeling like this?” I wish his voice hadn’t broke.

 

“What was I supposed to say? Oh hey Dad, I know I’m a burden and a disappointment and I’m worthless, but please love me anyway.”

 

_ Crap. _

 

“Peter Stark you are so many things, but you have never been and will never be worthless. Peter look me in the eye,” he waited for me to do so, “you are so much smarter than I was at your age. You are so much more selfless and brave than I  _ ever  _ have been. You see the good in even someone as problematic as me. You are the real hero.” 

 

“I can’t do the things you can do…” I murmured.

 

“No, but you can do so much more. I may help protect this world, but you are going to change it.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pepper arrives

“Oh Peter!” Mom exclaimed as soon as she saw me awake, wasting no time in pulling me into an embrace. 

 

“Honey…” she pulled back only enough to look me in the eye, she placed one hand on my cheek, rubbing her thumb over my skin. 

 

Then the anger came.

 

“What were you thinking?! You could have been killed! You can’t just  _ run away  _ when you’re having an issue! How could you...why would you think… what caused this?” She demanded, pulling back only slightly from me. My tears felt like fire as I fought to hold them in.

 

“I thought it would be bet-” she didn’t let me finish.

 

“You thought it would be better if you were gone?! Did you not think that everyone would look for you nonstop?! Did you…do you…” she started taking deep breaths to calm herself down more. Dad, who had just stood walking the whole ordeal, started rubbing circles on her back.

 

When she started talking again, there were tears in her eyes, “we love you  _ so _ much Peter. No matter how much you mess up, no matter what you do, we could  _ never  _ love you any less. Do you understand?” I simply nodded.

 

Before anyone could say anything more, a knock sounded at the door. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it’s so short, but I feel like Pepper deserves her own chapter


	5. Chapter 5

You would think after knocking they would wait for someone to call them in, but I know them better than that.

 

“We told you we needed some time,” Mom scolded, wiping a few stray tears from her face.

 

“I know, I tried to tell them. But we just couldn’t wait,” Uncle Steve explained as the rest of my family walked into the little med bay room.

 

“How you feeling, son,” Uncle Steve’s eyes turned soft when he looked at me. They all did. 

 

All my Uncles and Aunts, Steve, Clint, Bruce, Bucky, Scott, T’Challa, Happy, Rhodey, Vision, Wong, Thor, Sam, Loki, even Uncle Stephen came. And of course, Nat, Hope, Okoye. Also Wanda and Shuri, but they're more like my sisters.

 

_ Or was...will they even want me anymore? Mom said they’ll always love me, but she can’t speak for them. The have every right to hate me… _

 

_...I hate me... _

 

“We should give them a moment,” Mom whispered to Dad, by his expression it seemed the idea of leaving me never occurred to him. 

 

_ They’re only acting like this because for the first time...I was the one that left. _

 

“Hey детка,” Aunt Nat’s voice was softer than I have ever heard as she came over and laid next to me on the tiny bed. Wanda quickly came over and laid next to me on the other side. Both of these women, two of the  _ strongest _ women in the world have their arms wrapped around me as I struggle to not cry again.  _ I’ve been crying too much. I’m pathetic. I’m weak. _

 

“We wanted to check on you,” Uncle Bruce told me.

 

“We looked for you non-stop,” Uncle Bucky added on. That shouldn't make me feel even guiltier. But since when have I done as I’m supposed to do?

 

“Please leave,” I couldn't keep my voice from cracking.  _ For the first time, I need them to leave…  _ “please just  _ go  _ again.”

 

_ I shouldn’t have said again. _

 

“Peter-” Uncle Rhodey started before I cut him off.

 

“I don’t deserve this!” My voice came out too loud. Too loud, too much crying, I take too much of their time, I’m just too much. Too much of a burden for them to deal with. I’m just weighing them down. 

 

“Peter-” Okoye started that time.

 

“Why…” I broke off into a sob, “ _ why  _ couldn't you just let me leave?”

 

They didn’t have a response for me.


	6. Chapter 6

“Peter Stark look at me,” you know Aunt Nat is serious when she uses my real name, her voice came out as firm but not cold. When I refused to meet her eye, she gently grabbed my chin and turned it towards her. “How could you expect us to let you leave when we love you too much?”

 

“We never would have stopped looking for you.”

 

“We love you more than you could ever know.”

 

“Why couldn't you have told me this before I tried to leave?” I wish I hadn’t said.

 

“We didn’t think you didn’t know,” even though Uncle Steve answered me, everyone in the crowded room visibly winced. 

 

“Is this because we have to leave so much?” Wanda’s accent sounded thicker than usual. I didn’t have to audibly answer for everyone to know what I didn’t want to say. 

 

“We wish we didn’t have to go so much,” Sam tried to comfort me. 

 

_ But you still have to leave… _

 

_ I’m selfish. I know that. I’m a selfish brat that wants you to stay with me rather than going out and saving people.  _

 

“If there was any other way, you know we would do it.”

 

“Your parents always try to make it so that someone is always with you.”

 

_ You think I don’t know that? I know how hard you try. I know that they don’t  _ want  _ me to be alone. But wanting something doesn’t always make it happen. I’m tired of being alone… _

 

_ But by running away, I just force myself to stay alone forever… _

 

_ But that way, I can’t hurt them anymore. _

 

_ But I failed. All I do is fail. How could Tony Stark’s son be such a worthless failure? _

 

“How can we make this better?” Hope addressed me.

 

_ That’s the question...isn’t it? _


	7. Chapter 7

_ Can you fix a lifetime of pain and separation issues with a promise we all know can’t be kept? No. _

 

“Saying we won’t have to leave we all know would be a lie. And saying we will always come back can’t be promised. But we can promise that we will fight our hardest to not have to leave and to fight our hardest to always come back,” Aunt Nat told me.

 

_ But that’s never been enough…  _

 

_ Will anything ever be enough? _

 

“Okay guys, I know Pepper said I should give you a minute  but it has been multiple minutes and he is my son,” Dad barged into the room. He only hesitated a moment when seeing my tear covered face before going to the side of the bed Wanda was at, knowing that he would never get Aunt Nat to move. Wanda voluntarily let him take her spot, even though she didn’t seem to want to.

 

“Hey kid,” he whispered, wrapping an arm around me.

 

Then Mom came in, of course Aunt Nat moved for her, to which Dad scoffed at, muttering about favoritism.

 

_ This is all I’ve wanted, everyone here. But why isn’t it enough? Will it ever be enough? _

 

“Kid, I know we can't always be physically here for you, and I can't imagine how hard that is for you. But you know you can always call us. And if you really need someone to come home, we will always try to work it out. And if it's a longer mission, we can work harder to keep someone with you.” Dad started coming up with solutions. He's always been The Mechanic, ready to fix anything.  _ Can he fix me? _

 

“Peter,” Uncle T'Challa's authoritative voice silenced anyone else who wanted to talk. “You are always welcome in Wakanda. You are free to stay whenever you wish.”

 

“Also, if your parents are both gone, you can come stay with me if you want,” Uncle Stephen added on.

 

“There's options, okay? You don't have to be alone,” Hope concluded.

 

_ They don't know what will happen. _

 

“Pete,” Wanda's voice held a kind of softness she keeps for me, “even though it's scary to be alone. Believe me, I understand, but we will fight our hardest for you.”

 

_ This has to be enough. Doesn't it? _

 

“Thank you, everyone,”  _ what else is there to say?  _ “And I'm sorry that-”

 

“Kid, please stop apologizing.”

 

_ This has to be enough. I think it will... _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So y'all, tell me what you think. I think it ended kind of abruptly but I'm not sure how else to do it without it seeming repetitive.  
> But anyways, I really appreciate all the positive feedback, it's way more than I ever anticipated or hoped for.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Marvel fic. Please please please give feedback, I know I need it.


End file.
